Seven Tips for Parents
The seven tips for creating the right experiences with your child are based on over two decades of experimentation. We have learned from many experiences. We have tried many therapies and educational approaches. Looking back on these experiences, I realized that the seven tips capture the major ingredients that have made learning experiences work for us. They worked when Ananth was young. They continue to work today!
Tip 1. Be Mindful of Movement
Do activities that involve a simple pattern of movement. Examples include:
walking together
hanging clothes together
putting away groceries
putting dishes away
roll a ball together
cleaning the kitchen counter
setting the table
Technique: Regulation, Challenge, Regulation (RCR)
Regulation, Challenge, Regulation (RCR) is one of the most valuable techniques that I learned from Relationship Development Intervention (RDI). The parent sets up a pattern of interaction with competent roles for parent and child. The key is to set up a predictable pattern the child can recognize so that the child is regulated in the activity. Once the child is familiar with the pattern, introduce variations or challenges. Add the variations gradually to enable the child to accept the variations and reorganize the initial pattern of interaction. Practice the basic pattern for many days before introducing variations.
Activity: Walking Together
Parent and child walk together. Initially, follow the same route at the same time of day (Regulation). Slowly, introduce variations (Challenge). The parent stops suddenly. The parent starts walking forward or backward. The child notices these variations and responds to them. For example, when the parent stops, the child stops. Introduce variations gradually. Over time, the child anticipates and enjoys such variations (Reorganization).
Even I feel practicing RCR with daily chores takes a load off the anxiety which our kids feel most of the time.